Warning:  Do not try any of this at home.

Humanity did not evolve taking any of today’s recreational drugs. They are bad for health, and nothing pertaining to them has any enduring value because none of it is real.

Some of the strange experiences, however, of misguided friends during the 1960s and 70s are worthy of note here, and fallow well in the wake of other strange human stories, even though they are only hallucinatory. Names have been withheld to protect the imprudent.

RCP

UNLV

May 3, 2015

10:14 A.M.

 *  *  *

Cannabis and Hashish

Play Dough

Two young wastrels stoned on good quality grass are in a black-light room. One is threatening the other with a huge mass of red florescent Play Dough as though it were the legendary blob from the movie of that name...

“It will absorb you!

 It will absorb you!”

The reply:

“It will absorb you.”

This second young wastrel now examines his left forearm with the intention of revealing the wires and lights within, as he saw it done recently in an episode of Twilight Zone on TV.  

DMT Grass

A young student smokes and reclines. He first experiences becoming a fish swimming in the ocean, then back on land, a moving bicycle, then a multicolor flashing neon sign.

The Forked Pipe

A young archaeologist is smoking good quality grass in a strange Southwest US pipe of orange sandstone clay. It is forked like a pincher at the front. He worries that the pincher will grab his finger, but overcomes this fear, which he dismisses as the product of a good imagination, but now suddenly, he knows with absolute certainty that if he takes even one more toke, he will be sitting at a campfire in grim council with the “Ancient Ones” 

Champaign and Hashish

A young man-about-town has a date with a curvaceous brunette at his apartment. The couple begins in the kitchen sipping pink champagne. Then they move to the bedroom and smoke hashish. As the young man reaches a certain place in the high, he feels like he is on another planet, and wishes that he had tested this hash before using it for social activity. The next and only thing he remembers is walking the girl to her door later that night, but what happenend in the interim?

Front and Rear Brain

 A young visitor smokes marijuana pollen known as keif with friends. He notices a remarakable separation. The front half of his brain is engaged in light conversation with the others, while the rear half is involved with deeper philosophical maters. Cerebral multitasking apparently.

Rebirth

In Cambridge, a young concert goer scores a huge peace of Indian Hashish from a cute little blond woman. At home later. he takes one toke and is very stoned, and  then, quite naturally, precedes to take fifty nine more tokes, just for good measure. He reclines. Then it is dark, he is in a coffin, and feels his flesh rot away and fall off his bones. Suddenly the coffin lid flies open and he sees himself standing above with arms raised to the sun. He sits up and is reborn, merging with the live version of himself.

Megalodpn Tooth

After smoking good hashish, a young paleontologist picks up a five inch shark tooth and suddenly feels a sense of terrible power and ferocity with a surging forward through icy cold water laced with silvery air bubbles. 

*  *  *

LSD

The Membrane

His first day on acid, a young man encounters a membrane and wants to know what is on the other side. He presses his face against the membrane. It stretches, but does not break easily. Caution suggests to him that it might be better not to persist.

The second day, the young man again encounters the membrane. This time he feels that what is on the other side is a secret that will greatly increase his understanding of the universe, but again fear stops him.

On the third day, yes, the membrane. Now overwhelming need assails the young man. He will not pass up this opportunity again. He pushes his head firmly against the membrane, then harder, and finally through.

The fourth day the young man awakens, strapped down on a bed in a mental hospital.

Balls of Fire

A young musician is enjoying acid called California Sunshine as a passenger in the back seat of a friend’s car. They are stopped by the police for some routine reason of traffic.

As the officer talks with the driver, huge balls of fire enter the open rear window on the left and exit on the right. They are very beautiful, first red, then orange, then yellow, They fill the young musician with great happiness and unspeakable delight.

The young musician must try very hard to keep from laughing out loud with glee. Eventually the officer finishes and they are on their way.

The Giant Vulture

The same young musician, now completely sober, under the influence of nothing but his own past, is driving to Cape Cod. High in the sky a huge vulture is circling. The wing span is double that of even the greatest birds of prehistory, a full fifty feet. The giant bird spots the car, veers, and lands in the middle of the road half a mile ahead. The musician knows that this is just an acid flash and keeps driving.

Fruit Salad

This time our young musician is sitting at a friend’s kitchen table doing a fruit salad of drugs: one tab of LSD orally, also smoking morphine resins with hashish, plus the usual tobacco cigarettes, washed down with three cans of beer.

Being informed about this, a friend comments.

“I’m surprised. From the way you speak, I would have guessed just the three beers. You work well behind it all.”

The musician shrugs and cautions, “Yes, but as you speak, I am seeing you with horns, and flames coming out your mouth.” 

Stone Crabs 

A friend tells the musician how with hashish recently he found himself surrounded by hungry stone crabs about to jump on him, so he opened his eyes to get rid of them.

The musician replied, “With acid, the crabs would have jumped you, torn you to pieces, devoured you, then you would have felt yourself go down to their stomachs, be digested, and shit out.”

 *  *  *

Psilocybin

Flies and Train

A young pot head is telling a friend about a batch of psilocybin he took recently,

“Very unpleasant stuff. A swarm of black flies kept buzzing around my head. There was one thing I liked though. On the apartment wall, there was a Victorian pen and ink drawing of people riding through the countryside on a train. As I looked at it, suddenly the people began jouncing up and down and the scenery outside the train windows starts rolling by. Very realistic.” 

*  *  *

Mescaline

Furniture Looming

A young student has taken the minimum recommended amount of mescaline. Nothing happens for a long time, very boring. He gets up off the sofa and lies down on the floor. As he looks up, the nearby table seems to loom over him menacingly as if to pounce. He shuts is eyes, then reopens them with normalcy restored.

  *  *  *

Demerol

Roses and Trees

A middle-aged man in the hospital with a painful knee injury is given Demerol after surgery. Lying in bed, he looks at a vase of roses on the table. Suddenly an endless stream of roses start coming out of the vase.

When the mab is discharged, as he walks out, tiny evergreen trees just planted, begin to march along with him like little soldiers. The man enjoyed all of this.

*  *  *

Cocaine

Let it be...

A man is describing sex on cocaine to a friend.

“My dick was with her in the attic, but my balls were in the cellar.”

The friend, who always speaks against cocaine use, replies.

“Imagine how you’ll feel when you find that your balls are permanently locked in a banded steel box, on a freezing mountaintop, high in the Tibetan Himalayas, surrounded by a thousand Buddhist Sherpa monks chanting; Let it be. Let it be.”